So..im having a melt down. Silly i know, but i didnt just want to journal it tonight, i wanted to blog it.
I realize that conception and the birth of your own child is miraculous. A true gift from God, probably one of the best, and i dont take this opportunity for granted, but i find myself so physically done!
I suffered from a severe sinus infection for almost 2 weeks. It was really, really bad for 10 days and then with the assistance of anti-biotics i was over it in 10 days. I felt so gross..i could barely bend over, i couldnt sleep, i barely ate. I got better and thanked God for bringing my health back again. Well..im sick again. This is the weekend we are suppose to go to the states, and as excited as i am to spend some time alone with Ivon there is a part of me that doesnt want to go. Im so tired all the time, exhausted is a better word. I am reminded all the time that its only going to get worse in a few weeks but with Ivon working all night and sleeping all day i feel so alone. Its my fault, having a social life scares me. I can barely do the dishes anymore, i have no desire to clean my house & anyone that knows me knows i am a serious neat freak and i take pride in such a clean house.
I really must seem like i am feeling sorry for myself, i promise im not. I wish i could go to bed, sleep all night and feel like myself again. I am going now to say a little prayer that God will take some of this away and replace it with happiness...
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Aww honey, I will continue to pray for you to feel better. I don't think at all that you are feeling any sort of self pity, I can't imagine how terrible you must feel. Just remember that even when you feel like you're all alone, God is there waiting with you.... I love you!
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